Behind the Sofa - The Collaborative Doctor Who Blog

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The Christmas Invasion

Starting exactly like Rose began was a little surprising, as if this were a second beginning after a previous false start. If we thought that Rose had some similarities to Spearhead From Space we'll soon realise that this one's working through the entire 7th series. Jackie's dressing the tree and Mickey's fixing some mota' down the Arches (with Slade playing on the radio - not for the first time we have Noddy Holder in an episode of Doctor Who, the first being when he played Aggador in The Android Invasion [his scenes ended up on the cutting room floor]), then there's the familiar noise of the TARDIS' unearthly engines. And, in what has to be the craft's most spectacular landing yet, it rips out of the vortex and bounces around the Powell Estate like a pinball. Another kiss to Spearhead as the Doctor collapses out of the TARDIS in his predecessor's garb, but not before wishing Jackie and Mickey a merry Christmas.

Further domestic details ensure as we find out that a neighbour of Jackie, Tina the cleaner, has a lodger, probably called Roger, a medical student, who just so happens to have an accessible pair of stethoscopes lying around. The most disappointing part of the whole story is that the Doctor spends so much of it laid up in bed. For the most part simply emitting wispy burps. Bit what happens after you've been on a month long curry and lager binge.

The new Prime Minister, Flydale North's very own Harriet Jones, appears on TV to talk about the final approach to Mars of the British built Guinevere One space. In common with all other UK Mars probes, the chap in charge is a comedy look-alike. First we had Professor Colin Pillinger, who looked like a reject from a Nevermind the Buzzcocks comedy line up to spot the person who used to be in the Worzels, and now a Timothy Claypole of a man, called Daniel Llewellyn, who's in charge of the Guinevere One space probe programme. But, like Beagle 2, it has encountered some unexpected problems.

Rose and Mickey are out in town for some last minute Christmas shopping and are pestered by some really brassed-off Santas playing some copyright free music. Direction here is excellent, and the editing of the threat scene too, but then Mr Gold has a veritable epileptic fit throughout the percussion section of an 80 piece orchestra eventually coming to rest in the brass section. Sounds like a street steel drum band and a set of south American pan pipe people stuck in a blender. To be fair, this is the only low-light out of the entire score and we can forgive him one minor slip up.

I had some severe misgivings about the tree, and the Santas come to that, but it all seems to work fairly well in context. The frenetic version of Jingle Bells picking up speed as the tree attacks just sets off the scene lovely. Then we get a brief bit of action from the Doctor as he just wakes up in time to dispatch the tree with a wave from the sonic screwdriver.

There's some great interaction between the Doctor and Jackie throughout this story, none more so that the "what do you need" scene. There's not too many times in his lives he's faced with a screeching cock-er-ney rattling through not only the contents of the complimentary medicines section of a medium sized Holland and Barrett, but then starts working through the menu of a JD Weatherspoons. Even out of a post-regenerative state this would have been quite hard work.

And yet still he manages to get across enough information before admitting defeat to Jackie's onslaught. Mickey gets connected to the net for a bit-sized animation on what exactly pilot fish are. And later he's hacked into military command mainframes to track the approaching space ship. All on a 56k modem. War Games this ain't. I suspect that the speed of t'internet connection is slightly faster, only just, but there's not an acoustic coupler in sight.

Having temporarily lost contact with the bin lid heading towards Mars they've managed to hook up with the probe again and are about to receive a signal from Guinevere One on the Martian surface. 'Cept it's actually the inside of a rock-like spaceship. And the world goes insane. Craggy-faced, strange looking bipedal entities broadcast live on television. Could be an episode of the Hollyoaks spin-off,  Hollyoaks: Bad Skin, or just another term for Big Brother on Channel 4, but no, it's actually mankind's first contact with an alien race. The cars racing into the Tower of London is another Spearhead like scene, reminiscent of the one where the car takes Liz Shaw into UNIT HQ. And deep below the Bloody Tower, a UNIT operations centre. UNIT insignia everywhere. Excellent. But the Sycorax apparently have something else on their mind, like re-enacting Queen's video for Bohemian Rhapsody. Good job we didn't make contact with them on one of their Boney M nights. That would have just been plain silly.

As one third of the world population become zombified it's just like they've all turned on their iPods simultaneously. Scenes like this happen on a daily basis, this is nothing new, as people encase themselves in their own little world listening to, for example, podcasts of maniacs reviewing Doctor Who stories. Do you see what I did there? Crow-barred in a reference to a Tachyon TV spin off. Neat, huh? The digitally manipulated stock footage of international landmarks adds a certain cache to the programme. And why not, if Alias can travel the world and never set foot outside of California why can't Doctor Who do the same in Cardiff? Nothing so far in Doctor Who has come as close as the ludicrous episode of Alias where the estates department of Oxford University were armed to the teeth as they patrolled the campus buildings.

And as the massive Sycorax craft hits the atmosphere, passes over the head of a statue of Winston Churchill, and parks over central London, there's only one single solitary question on the, quite frankly, quivering lips of a terrified nation, "does this mean they're going to have to re-do the opening titles to Eastenders, you know, like what they did when the Dome was opened?". The imbeciles.

And with the Sycorax the BBC have finally proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that they're perfectly capable of creating a Klingon-like race just as ably as any American television network. Complete with spurious made-up lingo. I'd bet that if Who fans were as anal as Trek fans then we'd have a Sycorax dictionary, thesaurus, Linguaphone Speak-Along-a-Sycorax style cassette and complementary tea towel set out by the end of January. The Sycorax themselves look like the combined effect of 1000 Itchy and Scratchy cartoons, usually the ones where Scratchy invariably becomes separated from his fur and epidermis.

With a massive ship parked over central London, and more than likely flouting the strict congestion charge regulations, Mickey starts soling his undergarments as he and Rose carry the still unconscious Doctor to the TARDIS. Nice nod in the direction of Carry on Up The Kyber here as Mickey remarks on how British it is, having a cup of tea whilst the world ends. But, noticing that there's a strange energy emission coming from the planet surface, as Mickey attempts to get Sky Sports News on the TARDIS scanner, the Sycorax take the opportunity, whilst Jackie's not in the TARDIS, of bringing it on board.

And then the fun really starts... Is there anyone who didn't see the sudden speaking of English coming? And as the music swells, and everyone turns, expectant, to the TARDIS who didn't jump for joy as there, standing in his borrowed jim-jams, was the Doctor. And things just got better and better from there on in. Tennant is just brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. To use the Sycorax vernacular, Tennant Rocks.

The whole sword fight scene, I feel, could have benefited from a little more injection of pace, but that's a fairly minor point. And with humour ("and it's a fightin' hand") there's a touch of darkness as he sends the Sycorax leader to his death. I'd guess that, purely because of the density of them in the capital, he would have landed square on top of a Pret-a-Manger. Would have made quite a mess too, all that bone and sinew.

The return to terror firma is very Pertwee too, on two different counts. 1) as the Doctor tells Harriet Jones that the human race is sending things deeper and deeper into space, and is drawing attention to itself and 2)  as the PM order the destruction of the retreating spaceship, like the Brig in Doctor Who and the Silurians, offering the new Doctor a chance to engage the indignation of his former self and lambast the PM. These Torchwood geezers seem to have managed to turn the whole of central London into the Death Star's death ray. Nifty. I wonder whether they've done that by placing strategic Pret-a-Mangers around the city as a cover? Perhaps that's why there are so many of them?

And the closing few scenes are simply glorious. The newly regenerated Doctor doing what newly regenerated Doctors do best, and visit the now immense TARDIS wardrobe. I didn't even spot first time round the appearance of a scarf or two. I'd certainly like to see more of this version of the TARDIS. Jarvis Cocker is the Doctor.

And did you spot? The credit had reverted back to "The Doctor" again. What's that all about? And the BBC National Orchestra of Wales found the middle eight of the theme tune. Could it really have been any better? I always had a problem with Eccleston, as past postings will confirm. Sure, he's a great actor, but just not really Doctor material. And I think he pales into insignificance next to Tennant. But perhaps it was a necessary process, needing someone of Eccleston's profile/range/ability to kick start things again to make it accessible to a brand new audience. To use a bank holiday related analogy, Eccleston was the primer, the dull but perfectly functional application that's required to treat the surface before the highly glossy and brightly coloured final coat is applied.

And what a glossy finish we've ended up with...

The Bumper Book of Made-up Doctor Who Facts has this to say about The Christmas Invasion: The Queen, who's speech was beaten yet again in the Christmas ratings, has enlisted the services of RTD for next year's relaunch of this long running series. Gone will be the ceremonial robes and received pronunciation and in place there'll be a denim jacket and sarf London accent. The Queen is expected to be joined on her broadcasts by her new companion, Phil. It's expected that she'll meet an army of re-animated Lady Di's and the corgis will be back with a brand new look. The lawyers are still negotiating over the rights to use Camilla Parker-Bowles in the new series.

Christmas Cracker

The Christmas Invasion begins with a chaotic and confusing bang. Despite the fact that the 10th Doctor appeared perfectly fine and was still planning to visit the planet Barcelona at the conclusion of The Parting of the Ways, we suddenly witness the TARDIS crash-landing on the Powell Estate during the lead-up to Christmas. A manic and seemingly unstable Doctor emerges from his ship, and then, for some inexplicable reason, he collapses. Rose casually informs Jackie, Mickey, not to mention the audience at home, that yes, this really is the Doctor. No questions asked.

What happened in the moments (hours?) leading up to this unexpected entrance remain a complete and utter mystery. Or at least they would have done if it wasn't for the fact that there are millions of children starving in Africa. Phew.

I must admit that I was initially very sceptical about this episode. I'm not the greatest fan of Christmas (let alone Christmas specials), and when Russell kept harking on about tinsel, turkey and trees my heart sank. 'Camp as Christmas' was a term that kept surfacing in my mind during the run-up to transmission. I'm glad to report that the Christmas stuffing merely bookends the show - the rest of it could happen on any day of the year.

It's telling that the Christmas trimming is by far the weakest component of this episode, especially when it comes to the plot. I mean, who or what are the killer Santas? Are they robots? Are they tools of the Sycorax? Are they another race entirely? Autons, maybe? Why do they want the Doctor so badly when the Sycorax leader seems blissfully unaware of him when he eventually turns up? Is it the artron energy that leads the Sycorax to earth or the UK probe? Why didn't the Santas just kidnap the Doctor when they installed the tree at the flat? And how can these "pilot fish" have a convoluted and culturally specific plan ready to roll within hours of the Doctor's arrival? Bah humbug!

However, I was thrilled by the notion that small children up and down the country will be utterly petrified of shopping mall rent-a-Santas and artificial Christmas trees for many years to come. I guess that was the whole point: transforming the benign into the horrific - Doctor Who at its twisted best.

The biggest risk this episode takes is the decision to leave its protagonist flat out on his back for the majority of the story. Doctor Who fans are used to this of course: Pertwee and Baker were both confined to a hospital bed in their pyjamas, Davison spent a whole episode asleep in a box, McCoy almost took a whole season to really settle down, and Paul McGann didn't become the Doctor for ages in his debut. However, I was shocked to witness the same approach being taken today, particularly in this impatient channel-hoping hell in which we live in. Can you imagine Only Fools... viewers waiting 40 minutes for Del Boy to stroll in and say "cushty?"

And this is where Russell has been extremely clever, not to mention brave. He gives us a very familiar story but this time there's a fascinating - and fairly frustrating - twist.

It doesn't take a genius to point out that The Christmas Invasion is basically a re-tread of two stories that the audience will already be comfortable with: Rose and Aliens of London. Some of the similarities are impossible to dismiss: the opening shot is a direct reference to Rose; you've got familiar household objects attacking a hapless Mickey; synthetic automatons on the rampage outside Henricks again; Jackie still refusing to get off the phone when her life is in imminent danger; and Murray Gold going all 'President Flavia' on our ass. 

The AOL riffing is even more pronounced: alien invasion - check; iconic British monuments - check; Harriet Jones (complete with running gag) - check; completely useless revamped UNIT - check; anti-US jibes - check; unconvincing computer hacking - check.

The big difference is that the Doctor isn't there to sort it out for us. And things are going tits up. The Doctor's absence is the essence of the drama and his eventual Resurrection/re-birth (very Christmassy for an atheist, don't you think?) is enhanced by the fact that we are practically on our hands and knees begging for his messianic return. By the time he finally makes his bona fide hero entrance (with, remember, only 15 minutes to go!), it's a truly fabulous moment that must have thrilled everyone who was still watching.

The fact that over 9 million were still watching is testament to the fact that this show was thoroughly engrossing, even when Tennant was out like a light and subconsciously burping. The British version of 'Indpendence Day' felt suitably epic and exciting, and the thought of a third of the world's population as potential lemmings was quite a horrific one. Sally was pretty cute too. However, did we really need to see a profile of someone in Paris wearing a beret? Wasn't the Eiffel Tower enough? Incidentally, I'm not sure which city came after Rome (Cardiff, I guess).

Sadly, despite some jaw-dropping visuals from James Hawes (see right) it's not always possible to get that many extras to act simultaneously. While some of them look like they are positively pissing their pants when the alien ship appears overhead, others look like they are hearing the "shocking" news that Shayne just made the Christmas Number 1 spot.

Some of the humour also fell a little flat: "they're on the roof" and "Doctor Who?" (come on, get over it!) induced groans in my house, but there were plenty of genuine humdingers too: UNIT know what real Martians look like; the various Arthur Dent allusions tickled me no end (including the big yellow bulldozer); the staff gag was brilliant; the Bohemian Rhapsody video reference might have been unintentional, but still hilarious; and the already infamous 'Lion King' plagiarism had me projecting Baileys out of my nose.

The Torchwood hints were marvellously mysterious too; they sound like a cross between 24's CTU and The X-Files. And they probably shag like rabbits too. Maybe Sally will get a transfer there. Torchwood also seem to have taken over UNIT's Top Secret position as well, that organisation having blown its cover by putting up big signs telling the world where their HQ was situated. I just love the idea that Capt Jack could be sitting a few miles away, pressing a big red button that engages the Excalibur's main guns that blows the Drakh, sorry - Sycorax, out of the sky.

'Torchwood' sound really shady too. I wonder what fell to earth ten years ago? Was the Doctor involved somehow (who seriously wants to bet against it?). Stupidly enough, when I first heard the line that they had lost a third of their staff I put it down to a recent alien incursion, failing to grasp the fact that this was probably down to the whacky statistical coincidence that exactly one third of them have the same blood type. I don't know about you, but I think my theory sounds much better.

The Drakh, sorry - Sycorax, were an adequate race of foot-stampers who provided some necessary jeopardy and who reminded me a little of Faction Paradox (non-novel readers can skip this next bit). Let's see: they wear skulls for helmets, they are attracted to Time Lord bio-data (maybe), they use curses and voodoo as science, and they fly around in big edifice-type ships. Oh, and their name ends in an X.

Billie was magnificent as usual, and she essentially holds the whole thing together for large portions of the story, proving once again that they could legitimately change the name of this show to The Doctor and Rose. The moment where she tales on the mantle of the Doctor and attempts to talk down the aliens was gorgeous (although relegating the Daleks to an afterthought felt a bit tight!) It's just a shame that Murray Gold consistently undermines her beautiful performances with cheesy "sad music" whenever she starts crying. For christsake, tone it down!

And then, thanks to Jackie's flash of tea(!), the Doctor finally wakes up and kicks some arse.

Now, I know this is going to sound lazy and corny but Tennant nails it. Yes, I know that's what I said about Eccleston back in March, but as much as I loved Chris' performance, I always had this nagging feeling that he was either trying a little too hard, or sometimes he didn't quite get it.

David gets it.

What's really fascinating is that the Doctor doesn't settle on his character immediately. He plays with his persona. He tests it out. To put it simply, he uses the current threat to discover who he is and what he's capable of. And while it has become de riguer to echo past Doctors after a regeneration, the 10th does so in such a way it left me feeling dizzy with anticipation. For a moment there it could have gone either way. We could have ended up with a right bastard or a fey fop. What we get is an incredibly natural amalgam that simply screams Doctor! without ever feeling forced or a diluted parody.

OK, so the sword fight is literally a hit and miss affair - although it was an inspired decision to take it outside - but that image of the Doctor as the defender of earth - in his jammies no less - getting his hand cut off and then exacting righteous retribution with a satsuma was, in a word, priceless. The best Christmas present I've ever had, in fact. And I've been spoilt something rotten over the years.

But the biggest surprise for me was realising just how dark this Doctor could be. I thought Eccleston could be terrifying but when Tennant delivered his "I'm that kind of man" line the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. This is not what I expected. But the coup de grace has to be the dispassionate way he in which he watches Harriet Jones' golden age crumble to dust as his six magic words take their effect, all the time looking like an unholy cross between Jarvis Cocker and Eric Morecombe. In a party hat.

The fact that this image still manages to chill me to the bone convinces me that we're about to get one of the most compelling and complex Doctors yet.

Ah, poor Harriet Jones. Some critics have pooh-poohed the power of those six little words, but remember this: she was on national TV appealing for a seemingly non-specific Doctor during a moment of crisis! She must have come over as just a little bit crackers!

This bittersweet denouement came as quite a bit of a shock to me, especially in the midst of all the group hugs. To take an audience favourite like Harriet and then tear her down for her actions (even though the Doctor himself planted the seed that instigated them) elevated this into more than the cosy, celebratory romp it could so easily have been.

There are distinct echoes of The Silurians here, and Harriet's insinuation that the Doctor could be an alien threat, and the Doctor's riposte that humanity are the real monsters looks like it could set up a 'Torchwood V Doctor' stand-off. I dunno, somewhere in season seven...

And then we get the proverbial icing on the fruit cake. According to the commentary track to this episode (you have to love the BBC) it took the Mill three whole weeks to create the virtual wardrobe room. Worth every second, if you ask me. Is it just me, or is Tennant's shirt a very pale blue, and not white after all? If it's the former then all those people who tried dressing up as the 10th Doctor at the recent Stockton convention must feel like a right bunch of idiots now...

This scene also provides the opportunity for endless freeze-framing as you try to work out if that really is Casanova's tunic or McCoy's trousers. Hours of fun.

And just when you think it might go all syrupy as it starts to snow, Russell turns the situation on its head with the sick realisation that humanity is dancing and frolicking in the remains of their victims. Just think about that for a moment. A kids show. At Christmas. With dead bodies for "snow". Our characters are, quite literally, "steeped in death".

I also loved the revelation that when the Doctor and Rose head off for the stars again, leaving Mickey and Jackie behind to the safety of an estate that's already been threatened by three different alien races, the adventures are just the bits in between. The rest of the time they are simply having the trip of a lifetime...

And finally, just as you believe that things really can't get any better we get a (ah fuck it, I'm gonna use the word) fantastic trailer for series 2.

Sarah-Jane Smith! K9! Anthony Head as "I Can't Believe It's Not The Master"! Cats dressed as nuns! Robotic Adam Ants! Queen Victoria! Cybermen! Full-on snogging! Erm...

Only three short months to wait...

The Bumper Book of Made-Up Doctor Who Facts has this to say about 'The Christmas Invasion': if you look really carefully you can spot Ricky Gervais as Andy Millman standing on the roof of the Powell Estate.

And that's almost it for this year. I'll try to post a review of the Who year within the next couple of days*, and then I'm having a couple of months off! The blog will no doubt continue, and you be pleased/terrified to know that I have a very special 'Stripped Down' season planned for the blog's 1st anniversary (details to follow early in the new year).

Finally, in related news, Tachyon TV's first podcast experiment is being recorded this Thursday and new webzine issues of TTV should emerge in the first quarter of 2006. Q and I will also be redesigning this blog a bit over the coming weeks; if you have any requests or suggestions please get in touch.

*you can also read another Who flavoured review of mine over at Stuart's rather excellent Feeling Listless blog.

Merry Christmas (War is Over)

(With apologies - and notes to their lawyers - to Lawrence Miles and Tat Wood, whose excellent ‘About Time’ series I’ve been reading far too much of lately)

The Christmas Invasion

(One Episode, 25th December 2005.)

Which one is this?

Alien invaders come to say ‘hi’ to the people of Earth on Christmas Day and one third decide to jump off the nearest building in celebration. The newly regenerated Doctor does a good impression of most Generation Xers these days: lying around in bed until someone gives him a decent cup of tea. Then gets up, vanquishes the alien threat and - despite losing a hand - gets his mojo back.

Firsts and lasts

David Tennant’s Tenth Doctor (unless you count ‘Children in Need’). Though, like the man himself, you’ll have to be patient - this Doctor’s hardly awake for the first half-hour (owing to some typically troublesome post-regenerative indigestion. Apparently he’s giving off so much energy that it’s all he can do to stop burping it into space. And you never know who might notice it…)

The TARDIS crash-lands (quite spectacularly) on screen for the first time (though see 24.1 Time and the Rani for similarly unplanned materializations). The episode is also mankind’s first acknowledged encounter with alien life (though how the events with the ‘space-pig’ of Aliens of London have been glossed over is anyone’s guess). The British government’s ‘Torchwood’ project is also key to the episode’s denouement (acting almost as a left-handed pilot for the yet-to-come John Barrowman vehicle)

Things to notice about ‘The Christmas Invasion’

It opens with the same view of the Earth and its moon as Rose (the first of many elements in this episode to remind more casual viewers that what they’re watching is the same show, only different).

The Doctor spends most of the episode spewing out what appears to be the same stuff as he sucked out of Rose in The Parting of the Ways (is this the Artron energy from which both the TARDIS and Time-Lord regenerative powers stem from?). During near-death experiences it seems that one of his hearts is given to stop beating and the TARDIS’ ability to decipher alien languages is also impaired when its pilot is under the weather.

Big Ben is being rebuilt following the events of Aliens of London (see also 2.2 The Dalek Invasion of Earth for how this fits into 22nd Century Earth continuity).

Being a ‘regeneration story; we of course have the obligatory scene where the Doctor hunts for something new to wear; with a token Tom Baker-style scarf at one point being worn by the new Doctor.

The Continuity

The Doctor

Still not having a good time after regenerating - although there is the suggestion here that ‘being woken up too early’ prolongs the process. A strong cup of tea seems to be ideal for healing his synapses.

Sword-fighting seems to be an inbuilt skill of his, regardless of incarnation (see 16.4 The Androids of Tara or 20.6 The King’s Demon’s for just two other examples).

The Doctor’s new apparel is a brown, pin-stripe suit with brown overcoat. He sports a pair of Jarvis Cocker-style spectacles at one point (because - like the Fifth Doctor - he is partially short-sighted, or because they go with his new, Britpop-Indie-boy look?)

The Supporting Cast

Rose

Left deeply confused and upset by her best friend’s metamorphosis (at one point even grieving for him as though her ‘real’ Doctor is in fact dead). She’s still treating Mickey appallingly: using him as a shoulder to cry on, then happily going off with the Doctor again once everything’s resolved.

Her mock-defiance in the face of the Sycorax leader contains references to most of the aliens and societies she encountered in Season One.

Mickey & Jackie

Both able to recognise the sound of the TARDIS engines before it crash-lands. Mickey is now a mechanic, working in a garage near the Powell estate. Jackie has recently allowed someone called Malcolm to stay (whose pyjamas the new Doctor appropriates for his convalescence).

Harriet Jones, PM

As predicted by the Doctor, Harriet won a landslide victory following the events of World War Three. She knows more about alien intelligences than she’s willing to let on and instigates the use of the Torchwood project when necessary.

The Non-humans

The Sycorax

A war-like race who appropriate the British government’s ‘Guinevere’ space-probe to enslave one third of mankind, blackmailing the planet into surrender. Their spaceship appears to be a giant flying rock.

History

Christmas, presumably 2006 (Harriet Jones’ quick landslide could have come as a result of the previous PM being murdered by the Slitheen in Aliens of London).

The Analysis

Where does this come from?

Christmas Day episodes of popular dramas and comedies. Russell T Davies’ script makes pointed references about Christmas being a ‘time of peace’; with Harriet Jones’ comment about not letting the American President making the crisis ‘into a war’ being a particular dig at Bush-era ‘War on Terror’ politics. The ultimately doomed ‘Guinevere’ probe is also reminiscent of the ‘Beagle 2’ project of two tears ago. Besides that there’s a whole plethora of feature-film sources referenced here: Independence Day (huge alien space-crafts arriving in the skies; iconic structures being destroyed; token shots of the rest of the world in crisis), Starman (the probe that attracts the attention of alien life), Superman II (governmental appeal for absent, extra-terrestrial world saviour), Highlander (the Kurgan-like design of the Sycorax leader’s face and his and the Doctor’s ‘There Can Be Only One’ face-off); The Empire Strikes Back (The Doctor, like Luke Skywalker, loses a hand).

Things that don’t make sense

We never see what’s under the killer Santas’ faces (Sycorax, or something else?). The one-third of the population being of A+ blood group is a little contrived (would Torchwood also have exactly a third of its people being A+?). Rose tests the Doctor’s hearts through his pyjama jacket. And seeing as a major world-crisis has just been averted, would Harriet Jones PM’s standing be so quickly eroded by just those six words?

Critique

‘Someone’s got to be the Doctor’. Before criticising ‘The Christmas Invasion’ just bear in mind exactly when it was transmitted: primetime, 7.00pm on Christmas Day. Not exactly when an audience is demanding of something heavy and thought-provoking. So that’s exactly what we get: a fairly frothy, lightweight story that pretty much sets its stall out to reinforce the series’ idylls while at the same time giving a hint (just a hint, mind you) of what the new man at the TARDIS controls is gonna be like.

And like Rose, this has got more than an eye on the new, post-2005 audience. So we get Rose, Jackie and Mickey asking all the questions that the new audience wants answering; a shed-load of Christmas iconography (the Santas, Jackie’s killer Christmas tree) to remind us all that this is Christmas and Murray Gold providing a score that acts more as a ‘Greatest Hits’ compilation of Season One.

In its favour, it moves at a brisk pace with plenty of moments that the eight-year-olds will remember even in years to come (the spinning tree that tries to kill Rose, Jackie and co is a great example of the show’s age-old ability to make the ordinary sinister). The inclusion of Jackie and Mickey as regulars at last feels more than just tacked-on (though Jackie, noticeably, gets left behind again when the real action starts). And Penelope Wilton adds real depth to the slightly jokey Harriet Jones of last year (with a whole ‘power corrupts’ angle that reveals a whole new layer to her otherwise amenable demeanour).

Faults, as always with Russell T Davies’ Who scripts, are principally in the contrived way the whole plot gets resolved (with the Doctor simply calling the Sycorax leader’s bluff and pressing a big, orange button) and the often poorly matched mix of high drama and high comedy (stop trying to make this a British Buffy, Russell). Also, for someone who wanted this to be as ’Christmassy’ an episode as possible, all that iconography is forgotten about after half-an-hour. James Hawes’ direction is also largely nondescript (though the shots of two billion people waiting to jump are a standout; and more like something out of Davies’ The Second Coming).

Best Bits

The TARDIS bouncing off Powell estate buildings. The spinning tree. Rose asking the Doctor to ‘Help me’ being enough to wake him up. ‘The Royal Family are on the roof’. Daniel Llewelyn’s death by electrocuting-whip. The Doctor doing what he does best: talking the aliens to death. Tennant choosing his new clothes and the look Rose gives him as he walks into Jackie’s flat How this Doctor will ‘do domestic’ and sit down with his substitute family for Christmas lunch.

Quote/Unquote

‘The Spirit of Christmas: birth and rejoicing and the dawn of a new age’ (Daniel Llewelyn, summing up both the Guinevere project and this episode’s mandate to set Doctor Who off on its new path)

‘Did you miss me?’ (Course we did…)

‘No second chances. I’m that sort of man’. (The new Doctor shows real steel beneath his larking exterior).

‘Don’t you think she looks tired?’ (Blair/Brown, anyone?)

Looks like the Trip of a Lifetime is off again…

See you all in March…and of course, ‘a Merry Christmas to all of you at home!’

(‘The Bumper Book of Made-Up Doctor Who Facts’ has this to say about ‘The Christmas Invasion’: the artificial language for the Sycorax was devised by having Nicholas Briggs read a Pip and Jane Baker script backwards while gargling on TCP)

Sycorax rock! 2

Thank goodness, six months haven’t dulled it. After all the hype I was sure I’d be disappointed by this festive treat but boy was I proved wrong. It’s not perfect and parts were desperately weird but after half a year’s wait I couldn’t ask for more.

Pity they didn’t include the Children in Need bit as a pre-credit sequence. I saw it on the night but if some poor soul missed it, how could they get why the TARDIS crashed? But still, we were plunged straight into the action with the Doctor passing out and being put to bed. One question went through my mind at this point: who changed him into those PJs? I wouldn’t really like to speculate.

The pacing was a little hectic at this point and there wasn’t enough lead-in. The flame-throwing santas were actually pretty funny, as was the Christmas tree. Both looked much better than in the teasers and just know that would scare me sh*tless if I was a small, impressionable kiddie. And how Arthur Dent was it all? Jackie is just as she was before, but finally she’s being written as a comedy character so she’s not that grating, annoying strumpet so much anymore. As for Mickey getting braver, I didn’t see much in it. Sure, he held up a chair for a while but I still can’t like him much. Both Noel Clarke and Camille Coduri’s performances have improved since last series.

One question went through my mind at this point: who changed him into those PJs?

Penelope Wilton is a wonderful PM, I was hoping there’d be more in the way of expletatives in her response to the American president. All the staff in the U.N.I.T. headquarters were excellent, actually. A special mention has to go to the major who would’ve made a nice Brigadier replacement.

And the sycorax; a welcome return to the land of the quarry. But those costumes, genuinely scary, (until the Doctor comes onto the scene). Also, more mention of Torchwood – could this possibly be the same thing BBC3 is going to broadcast in a little while?

Yay!!! Jackie’s been left behind! Yeah, I said I’d stopped hating her but she’s still pretty darn annoying. Rose’s speech, nicking every alien she’d met was funny and pathetic in just the right way. The volume balance was way up for the Sycorax meaning I missed all the translated dialogue from that scene. Good thing it’s similar to English...wait a minute! That must mean the Doctor’s better! And cured by a cup of tea, we really are delving deep into Hitchhiker territory. And he bursts out of the TARDIS doors and you just know he is the Doctor. Months of waiting and worrying over whether he would work are over and I’m convinced David Tennant will work out just fine.

Facing off against the Sycorax he’s a little manic but it works, I was on the edge of the sofa, (and not behind it for once,) as he pressed the big, threatening button. Stupid because would RTD really kill off a third of his production team?

One thing: couldn’t they have put a beep over the Doctor’s insult to the Sycorax leader? I’m not sure younger viewers should be exposed to such indecencies, even in another language. But how rockin was the sword fight? Sure, he was useless at first and if they had been lighter swords the action could’ve been faster but still, how often do you get great swordfights – for the planet no less – fought by a guy in his jim-jams?

The sets seem to have matured for this new series, (I’m counting this as the first episode just coz it’s now) because I always felt the last one was a little studio-bound. The exterior space-ship was amazing and it all just felt more grownup. When the hand was severed, I didn’t notice on first viewing until he actually said it. But that’s OK, coz the new one’s a fightin’ hand!

So this is what the tenth Doctor is – no second chances. And remember, this planet is defended. I’d love to take the piss out of that line but I can’t, it was too good. Any claims of wooden acting have been put to rest, I think.

Back on earth, the politician does something stupid and cruel. So we can all stop looking forward to this Golden Age and realise it’s all fairly rubbish. And if those words can topple a government, everyone should get out onto the streets and graffiti it everywhere. This scene was serious, and David Tennant does serious very well. We’re spoiled!

And finally – a view of a different part of the TARDIS! That outfit is perfect, it makes him look really tall. This is the start of a whole new adventure and March can’t come quickly enough.

The Christmas Invasion was almost bound to disappoint the fans who’ve been waiting for it eagerly but it succeeded in capping off the first year of what I hope is going to be a long period back on the Beeb. And David Tennant works as the Doctor, all my nightmares of him being a camp simperer were just down to the Christmas pud. The whole thing was only ruined by my family who I had to hide the remote from. After an hour spent guarding the recorder, though, I could scurry off and enjoy this feast. Was it worth the teases, the threats, the rolling eyes? You better believe it. And guess where that Christmas money’s going? Box-set here I come!

PS – Attack of the Graske was so fun! I practically flunked it first time round but second play and I’m almost good enough to travel the universe apparently.

A special Christmas

One of my own personal reservations about the Aliens of London / World War Three two-parter when it aired earlier this year was that, for an alien invasion happening slap-bang in the middle of London – even one subsequently denied away as a hoax – it didn’t feel nearly epic enough. It seemed to want to be an alien invasion version of Davies’s excellent ITV return-of-Christ drama The Second Coming but couldn’t quite hack it.

This time, however, an epic feel is given to proceedings by the excellent direction of James Hawes, the man who so successfully helped the poll-winning The Empty Child / The Doctor Dances two-parter last year. He brings a cinematic touch to proceedings while at the same time never allowing the visuals to come at the expense of Davies’ witty and well-structured script, which is also a vast improvement over his previous alien invasion effort, and one of the best stories he has so far turned in for the series he has so successfully masterminded the revival of.

The major success of Davies’s scripting of The Christmas Invasion comes in the balance of the dark and the humorous, a balance he strikes just about perfectly here. It’s not a completely lightweight romp, but it has more than enough humour and lighter material for both the timeslot and the transmission date – slap bang in the middle of Christmas Day prime time – but also enough of a dark and sinister side to give it that good old-fashioned menacing Doctor Who feel. The Sycorax really feel like a credible threat, albeit somewhat in the tried and tested old-fashioned Doctor Who mould – a race of aliens who all look the same with one evil leader who speaks for them all. Mind you, when the leader is being played with as much relish as Sean Gilder seizes the part with, it’s pretty difficult to complain about that!

The style of the aliens is not, of course, the only kiss to the pass included here. There are all sorts of loving touches – the return of UNIT once more, who look like a credible organisation with a bit of budget behind them, just for a change; the brief appearance of a season eighteen-style Fourth Doctor scarf near the end, and even nods to The Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and – one admittedly appreciated fully only via the website, you can’t see the logo on screen doubtless for fear of giving poor old Nigel Kneale a heart attack – the British Rocket Group.

More importantly for the current incarnation of the series, however, familiar elements from the previous season are on hand to reassure viewers that despite the change of lead actor this is still the same programme. Rose, of course, struggling to accept that this is the same man before finally joyously realising that this really is her friend – “No argument from me!” Mickey and Jackie, who continue to improve and become more familiar and friendly as characters, with Jackie in particular looking as if she gets on far better with the Tenth Doctor than she did with the Ninth. And of course Harriet Jones.

Jones was one of the hits of Aliens of London / World War Three, no doubt almost entirely because of the performance of the actress the part was specifically written for, Penelope Wilton. Wilton is excellent again here, as the audience is taken on a somewhat surprising journey, being made at the end of the programme someone we’re supposed to dislike. It’s actually fairly heartbreaking in a way, Jones having been such a likeable and friendly character – I’m always reminded of Shaun Lyon’s memorable line about wanting to go home and eat cake with her when I think of her. Yet here she is destroying a retreating alien vessel and finding herself the target of the new Doctor’s venom.

Ah yes, the new Doctor. What kind of a man is he? Well, if The Christmas Invasion is anything to go by, a pretty amazing one. It’s a surprise looking back to find just how much of the hour he is absent from, as when he does appear on the scene fully-working and raring to go, he absolutely steals the show. Christopher Eccleston is one of my favourite actors and has been for years, but I have to say that even in just the time he had here, David Tennant shows the makings of a far more memorable incarnation of the Doctor. Witty, charismatic and charming, he also has the slightly sinister edge many of the truly great Doctors have had, the desire to do what is right and proper and a firm sense of morality. Tennant is excellent at both sides to the character, when delivering funny lines – “can’t get the staff!” – or when dressing down Harriet Jones or doing the “no second chances” bit.

There’s a wonderfully uplifting sense to the character as well – the idea of a new beginning, a new man and someone you really want to be with at that. His costume selection in the TARDIS wardrobe – another new room at last! – accompanied by that happy song is a great bit, as is the somewhat surreal sight of the Doctor sitting down to Christmas dinner, complete with crackers and silly paper hat. The Ninth Doctor very firmly didn’t “do domestic”, but the Tenth seems to be rather more amenable about fitting in with local customs.

And then we even get snow! Undercut in typical Doctor Who fashion with the dark revelation of what the substance falling from the sky actually is. The ‘snow’ looks fantastic anyway, but that probably doesn’t need saying as the entire episode looks absolutely wonderful. So many triumphs from the director, the designers and The Mill – the Sycorax ship, the use of the Tower of London as the UNIT headquarters, and destruction of the Gherkin… It all looks superb, suitably epic and brings a real feeling of glossiness and expense to the show.

Murray Gold’s music is also turned up a notch in quality, or at least given a different feeling and texture by the use of the BBC National Orchestra of Wales for a fully-orchestrated incidental score and a new rendition of the closing theme. It sounds wonderful, and fully justifies the expense. You have the feeling – as happened so often with the last season – that everyone has come together to put in their all and bring to the screen the very best episode of Doctor Who they could possibly make.

And what’s even better is that this is just the start of the Tenth Doctor’s era! There’s so much more to come, and I doubt I was alone in wanting to follow the Doctor and Rose’s journey to those stars they were pointing up at right away. Instead we have to wait until the spring, but kindly the BBC did at least allow us a sneaky glance at the future adventures in store with the “Coming Soon!” trailer at the end of the show. And didn’t that look absolutely marvellous? The Face of Boe! Sarah Jane Smith! K9! Queen Victoria! Cybermen! Oh my giddy aunt!

I absolutely cannot wait for the second season, but before that we’ve been given a truly spectacular Christmas gift in The Christmas Invasion. This is a truly wonderful episode, perfectly judged for the festive season and fully deserving of its pride of place in the BBC schedules.

And we even know already we’re getting another Christmas special next year! Hurrah! Roll on 2006 – it’s going to be amazing.

Liveblogging the Christmas Invasion

Shhh. The kids are all asleep. Alone at last. Finally, it's time to watch the New Who. Let the liveblog commence. (And no, I haven't read anyone else's post yet. I jumped right to the "Compose New Post" without peeking.)

My apologies in advance. I know this isn't going to be particularly lyrical to read, but liveblogging never is. Roll on.

* Tardis falling and crashing into buildings. Excellent! Absolutely lovely even though the CGI is a bit apparent. Watch the lighting model, guys. I can't believe I"m actually happy to see both Mickey and Jackie. That speaks more to my Doctor Who deprivation of many months than I care to say.

* Vortex: YAYAYAYAYAYAY. There's nothing like a time vortex to make one's heart leap with a sense of joyful wonder. Nice to see you again, even though it's been what, just a month or so since Children In Need.

* Lightfingered Jackie. Can you not love the bit about "She was asleep. So I just took it."? I don't buy the "One bottle of his blood could change the future of the human race" line. Especially not from Rose. "Anything else he's got two of?" Rolling with laughter at that one. Excellent. And the diurnal vortex emissions? Do you suppose the CGI folks deliberately made that look like...well...you know?

* Rocket ship in the goldfish tank. Love it. Harriet Jones, PM. Love it. Evil Fathers Christmas. Nicely spooky. Wonder if they're Autons or not. They don't *look* like the Autons. Not plasticky enough. But there's a new tree. Perhaps it is the Autons. Hey, I want a tree like that. Kewl! (Related: http://www.google.com/search?q=%22james+brady%22+%22Killer+trees%22) Doctor as AAA-Cell. Love that too! (Oh lord. I'm dreadfully enthusiastic. Sorry.)

Just a note here. I'm not sure I like the whole Doctor-as-passive-victim thing. He's supposed to motivate the action, not be a useless lump.

Right.

Continuing:

* Flashbacks to Aliens of London/WWIII. To be frank, those are not episodes I really want to flash back to. Remember Dalek? Father's Day? Empty Child? Those were the good ones. Those are the ones we should be taking our cues from, not AoL/WW3. And I hate those newscasters. Sorry, but I do.

* UNIT. Okay. I can dig that. And Harriet Jones--complete with ID card. Love that! "Of course not, Martians look completely different." Fantastic line there. And "Zally"? Step away from the collagen injections. It's not the answer and the good lord made your lips not needing additional pump-action cosmetic surgery.

* Cute Torchwood ref. Nice way to put it into the story. And they just lost "a third of their staff". Fascinating.

* Mind control. Creepy! Wow, this seems to be an excellent time to have been a Welsh television extra. (Or a CGI human model.) Don't Jump! Don't Jump!!!!

* 30 minutes in. And the ole Doc is still a lump. Get up you useless layabout.

* Sonic Wave, "It's hit the atmosphere". Right up with "It's downloading the Internet".

* Ships interior. More with the useless guys standing on shelves. The Dalek ship was better.

* Llewellyn. Not the strongest of actors or characters. I hope he gets squished soon. Vwoooop! Yup. Right on time. SQUISH! Big army dude. Squish! ID card. YAY! Leaving Jackie behind with the food. Bigger YAY!

* COMPANION SCREAM! REAL AUTHENTIC COMPANION SCREAM!!! My holidays are made. Woohoo!

* Ah. Tea. That most English of cures medicinal.

* She made the bad guys laugh. Made me laugh too. Good bit.

* "Rude and not ginger." I think I love this new Doctor. "Lion King". Ditto. And "Survival instinct's too strong". Nice resolution to the jump/no jump scenario.

* Swordfight? NO. The Doctor does not do swordfight. Not to save the planet. He *thinks* his way out situations. He does not bash aliens with large chunks of metal. Even with "a fahtin' hand"

* "Very Arthur Dent". *applause*

* "No second chances. I'm that sort of man." Even bigger *APPLAUSE*

* Harriet!??  WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!!! Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!
No. No. No. No. No. No. No. NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

And I liked her.

I really liked her.

....Why?

(I caught the Baker scarf and the Pertwee cape and the thin McCoy scarflet, but not much else in the clothing selection. I was hoping to see the Davison cricketing outfit. :( Was that a Casanova jacket, the red military get-up? And in the mirror. What was the name of that alien whose helmet was there? And wasn't that the most beautiful of interior rooms? Perfectly done.)

"Trouble's just the bit in between" Lovely. (I'm still ticked off at Harriet, mind you. Really ticked off. And I *liked* her.)

Edited to add: I think that was Nyssa's dress there!

Sycorax rock!

OK, a proper review tomorrow but I'd just like to say how great that was and, in the hope it might work, don't you think Tony Blair's looking tired?

David Tennant: you're definately the Doctor.

Stupidly short post...

"Don't you think she looks tired?"

Well, this is it. The final review of this year. As I speak I'm downloading the commentary (see the official site where they're throwing it away - thanks for pointing that out, Neil)  with every intention of burning it to CD and listening to it while rewatching the episode again tomorrow and it just remains to go over the hour of goodness that the Doctor Who team have decided to throw our way.

And what an hour! That amazing crash-landing, those impressive Christmasy dangers, the Sycorax, the Doctor regrowing his hand, the new TARDIS room... everything! It was all so fantastic, and a clear indication that David Tennant is going to be a great Doctor. Hell, even Mickey started getting braver... good thing too... ahem.

There was so much to like about this episode I don't even know where to begin. The plot - the Doctor is still regenerating while there's an alien threat closing in on Earth - didn't sound all that great, but it's pulled off with effortless style and charm by all involved. The reversal at the end is a tad unexpected but well done and if you aren't excited by the preview of the new series, then you're clinically dead.

About the new Doctor... David does serious well (I missed Secret Smile sadly, so this is really the first time I've seen him do that sort of thing) but it's nice to have a Doctor that does light-hearted more easily then Eccleston.  The new outfit really does suit him, which is great since I wasn't totally convinced by the pictures, and there's a twinkle in his eye which makes you almost instantly like him. And he was revived by a cuppa! I mean - come ON! A cuppa!

Rose has some wonderful moments - her breaking down when she realises the Doctor can't save her this time, her delight when he does, the way she leans on Mickey, the way she tries to bluff her way on the Sycorax ship... she's an amazing character and I'm almost certain she'll be back for series 3... sorry, 29. (Yes, I'm adamant that the current series is no 2 but 28. Stop looking at me like that.) Looking forward to Mickey and Jackie's next appearence as well... the way this Doctor happily bonds with them at the end is a complete contrast to No. 9 and can only lead to better things. Can't wait.

Join me in watching the preview for the new series again, won't you? It's up on the official site for all to watch. Go on - just the way Tennant says "K9!" gave me goosebumps. And that's nothing copmpared to the ever-so-brief glimpse we got of the Cybermen in action. Oh yeah. It's gonna be another cracker.

Did anyone play the game by pressing the red button? I did - great fun. Then again, it was aimed at young viewers and I am 21, but even so an entertaining waste of 10 minutes. If you missed your chance, play it again after the repeat on New Years Day. You know you want to...

And I hope you all had a merry Christmas. I certainly did. As well as my RC Dalek (which TOTALLY kicks arse) and my DVD boxset, I also got the Shooting Scripts book - totally unexpected and a great pleasure to recieve. I'll review it before the year's out. Which reminds me... I'm thinking about reviewing the Big Finish audios in the New Year... two a week. Want me to do it? Think it's a bad idea? Comment! Nobody talks about my posts anymore. It's depressing.