Behind the Sofa - The Collaborative Doctor Who Blog

Future Shock

Gridlock

Russell T Davies has admitted freely that the influence of Judge Dredd's Mega City One is all over his script for this episode, and it shows - with a varied array of freaks, crazies and weirdos trapped on the Motorway, not to mention the lovely deliberate homage to informer Max Normal (though it would have been great to have The Businessman talk in Max's "hey daddio" patter rather than the predictable upper class). Though I think that Judge Dredd would have banished the cat people to the Cursed Earth as being mutants. There were links too in the concept of a never ending traffic jam, with people living in "mo-pad" mobile homes for all their lives, and the idea of "City bottom" being somewhere where bad things happen.

However, where as Dredd's world has a consistent internal logic, RTD's script  had more holes in it than a swiss cheese factory. To be honest it would be easy to find fault with loads of things (such as, if they had inter-car communication, why, in 24 years had no-one radioed back to say that the motorway didn't go anywhere?), but at the end of the day you know what? I actually really enjoyed the episode - and that's primarily because it had bags of heart, and dealt with the idea of faith through adversity in an interesting and entertaining way.

I am not a religious person at all. I have only been to church for the obvious christenings, marriages and funerals. And I have strangely never heard "The Old Rugged Cross" before - despite it apparently being one of the top ten hymns. Maybe that's why the whole scene with the travellers singing  together genuinely moved me. I have watched it several times since Saturday, and each time the same thing happens. Maybe it's sloppy writing to have a Christian hymn survive so long, and maybe the whole New Earth thing would fit better if it was a few hundred years in the future rather than five billion, but it worked for me. Apparently the more people change, the more they stay the same...

Maybe that's why the whole scene with the travellers singing  together genuinely moved me.

That's seemingly true of the Irish as well, at least on New Earth. Americans seem to have disappeared from New New York, but Brannigan is evident proof that the Irish still have their pioneering spirit in the far future. I found it easy to ignore thoughts of Thermoman and just enjoy Ardal's performance - the makeup being so excellent didn't hurt either. I can only assume that one of the reasons their journey took so long was because they pulled into the equivalent of a service station occasionally, bought a hit of "happy happy joy joy" from those dodgy street vendors and had a bit of inter-racial shagging in the lay-by. "Dogging" takes on a whole new meaning. Still, the kittens were dead cute.

...bought a hit of "happy happy joy joy" from those dodgy street vendors and had a bit of inter-racial shagging in the lay-by.

Both The Doctor and Martha were excellent once again, particularly Martha bonding with her kidnappers, and the Doctor rocking the status quo by asking those questions all the little Mo-Padders had forgotten to think about.

And then we have the return of the Macra, or the Tulips of Doom as they looked at first glance. No reason why they were there, no genuine reason for them to attack people and no resolution to their presence at the end of the episode - typical stuff from our Mr D then really! Still if you are going to have a pointless monster to create some menace, it might as well be one from 40 years ago.

Finally, the Face of Boe uses his life to let everyone out of the Undercity and  gives his last, predictable message to the Doctor. I was hoping for him to ask the Doc "Why are you always shouting?". Still, we knew what was coming, it was just the way David Tennant played it perfectly that made all the difference. Shock and denial all at once, but still keeping it all internalised. It's also good to see that Martha won't take no for an answer  or any of the old "I'll explain later" crap from the Doctor. More and more I prefer her to Rose.

Next Week: Daleks Take Manhattan. Who's for Dalek Sec in a huge Busby Berkeley number?

Quote, Unquote...

The Shakespeare Code

The Witches : Eye of newt, and toe of frog,Wool of bat, and tongue of dog, Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,Lizard's leg, and howlet's wing,-- For a charm of powerful trouble,Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

The Doctor : All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances, and one man in his time plays many parts.

Martha: I like this place and willingly could waste my time in it.

Shakespeare: Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.

The Doctor: Wherever the bright sun of heaven shall shine, his honour and greatness of his name shall be.

Shakespeare: Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight! For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night.

Martha: Words, words, mere words, no matter from the heart.

Lilith: What is decreed must be.

Wiggins: The stroke of death is as a lover's pinch, Which hurts and is desired.

Lilith: Hell is empty and all the devils are here!

The Doctor: To sleep, perchance to dream...

Martha: Love sought is good, but given unsought, is better.

The Doctor: What's in a name? That which we call a Rose by any other name would smell as sweet.

Peter Streete: My cue is villanous melancholy, with a sigh like Tom o' Bedlam.

Lilith: Why then tonight let us assay our plot.                                                                         

Shakespeare: Oh, I am fortune's fool!

The Carrionites: When shall we three meet again in thunder, lightning, or in rain? When the hurlyburly 's done,When the battle 's lost and won.

The Doctor: Though this be madness, yet there is method in 't.

Shakespeare: By the pricking of my thumbs,Something wicked this way comes.

By the pricking of my thumbs,Something wicked this way comes.

Martha: Now is the winter of our discontent.

Lilith: To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,To the last syllable of recorded time.

The Crowd: O villain, villain, smiling, damned villain!

The Doctor: Out, damned spot! out, I say!

Lilith: Cry 'Havoc', and let slip the dogs of war!

The Doctor: Thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges.

Shakespeare: What a piece of work is man! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals.

The Carrionites: That it should come to this!

Lilith: A plague o' both your houses!

Martha: Now go we in content to liberty, and not to banishment.

Shakespeare: Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow.

The Queen: Off With His Head!

The Doctor: We are such stuff as dreams are made on...

Short version: I loved it.

Judoon Platoon On The Moon

The Doctor is back on our screens...and so am I - finally back on the blog. Let's see if I can make it to the end this time.

Smith And Jones

So how was the opening episode of the new series? Last year I gave Russell T Davies a right royal mauling for the mess that was "New Earth". Could he pull it back and give us a decent opener AND introduce a new companion? Well...yes and no.

From the start, everything was looking good. Realistic dialogue with Martha and her dysfunctional family. An unexpected bump into The Doctor in the street with a cryptic message. Roy Marsden's officious consultant and then, there is Mr Smith, grinning like a loon in his stripey PJ's.It was smart, sexy and bristling with promise. And Martha was really, I mean really good. Looks, brains AND attitude .This time last year I had already wanted to slap Rose twice within the opening ten minutes.

Mr Tennant was on superb form too. Okay, so we all get his little character tic's now - the repetition, the strange EMphaSis on certain words. But this time it was actually quite endearing. I liked the gag about "I like the little shop" and his sorrow at the loss of the Sonic Screwdriver - well until he flippantly chucked it away.

"I got rope burns off that kite"..."Not her, she'd hold us up". Great stuff. The only letdown was that damn "hokey cokey" moment when the Doctor was getting rid of the radiation. I actually squirmed with embarrassment.

The plot, always one of RTD's weak points, worked too. The transfer of the hospital to the moon made sense. The Judoon scanning everyone to find the Plasmavore made sense. Even THAT kiss was a logical extension of the plot. True, the "slab" creatures did look a little too much like the evil version of The Stig from Top Gear (I almost expected Clarkson to pop up with "Some say he is from the planet Zovirax is made of leather and works for blood-sucking little old ladies...)"

"Some say he is from the planet Zovirax is made of leather and works for blood-sucking little old ladies..."

But then, like our eponymous time traveller himself must feel sometimes, I suddenly was in the the grip of a strong sense of deja vu. Flashback a year and what was I carping on about? Endings. And wouldn't you know it, the Whomeister is at it again. Sigh. The resolution of the plot was downright terrible.

...RTD sits in his office surrounded by awards. "So the oxygen is running out, Martha's unconscious, the Doctor's weak and the MRI is going to explode any second. Solution? The Doctor comes up with a fantastic plan and saves the day? Nah. Sugar water and a hug? F**k, used that one last year. I know!  He simply unplugs the machine, carries Martha up a corridor and the Space Rhinos zap everything back to normal. Hooray for me!!"...

"Solution? The Doctor comes up with a fantastic plan and saves the day? Nah. Sugar water and a hug? F**k, used that one last year."

I despair sometimes.

Fortunately, things did get pick up. I could have done without the extended bickering about the blonde bimbo (please, not another "This is me putting my foot down" 'comedy' moment) but once the Doctor appeared the dialogue sparkled . The whole TARDIS sequence, with the Doctor mouthing "bigger on the inside" was played to perfection. Oh and Martha sure is forward isn't she? What a refreshing change. I'm looking forward to seeing how this relationship pans out over the coming weeks.

By the way, am I the only one who wished that the Doctor had to manage for a couple of episodes without that sodding Sonic Screwdriver before creating a new one? Guess the marketing men wrote that part of the plot then.

Mention should as always be made of Murray Gold's incidental music. As usual, it varied from the sublime (Martha's Theme, the balcony scene on the moon) to the downright bloody awful (anything with the Judoon on screen). I'm convinced that he just DOESN'T know how to write action music, and resorts to bashing a few pots together in the vain hope that it will sound "exciting". Strange thing is, his themes and melody's can be among the best on TV.

Next Week: The Shakespeare Code. Guaranteed to be better than anything written by Dan Brown.

Meet The Authors : Kevin Jordan

Age: 39
Location: Essex, UK (no jokes please)

Homepage: http://rubber-room.blogspot.com/ was my aborted attempt at a weblog. The first paragraph was good. That was as far as it got. One day...

Earliest Dr Who memory: Bits and pieces of various Pertwee's including Curse Of Peladon, but it was Planet of the Spiders when I became a true fan.

Favourite Doctor Who TV Story of all-time: The Deadly Assassin, with The Empty Child / The Doctor Dances on it's heels.

And on the opposite end of the spectrum:  God, Timelash by a mile.

Favourite Doctor: The one's that weren't Colin Baker. Oh if I must - Peter Davison.

Favourite Companion: Steven. Peter Purves was great.

Favourite Doctor Who Novel: Of the ones I have read, I seem to remember Love and War being resonably good.

Favourite Doctor Who Audio: Minuet in Hell

Favourite Doctor Who Website: Outpost Gallifrey - Particularly for the great DVD covers section in the forum. Oh and this one for making me feel so welcome.

Favourite non-Who Website: So many... http://www.newsarama.com/ for comics (of which I have FAR too many), http://jelly.b3ta.com/ for humour and www.digitalspy.co.uk for TV.

Favourite Film: Moulin Rouge

Favourite TV Show: Old: GBH (Alan Bleasdale's masterpiece) or A Very Peculiar Practice. New: House.

I enjoy listening to: Tori Amos, The Flaming Lips, Chris Rea, William Topley etc etc.

I enjoy reading:  Stephen Donaldson, Terry Pratchett,Jasper Fforde, Peter F Hamilton, Tad Williams. I won't touch Robert Jordan though.

Other sci-fi I enjoy: Lost, Carnivale, Dead Like Me, Sapphire & Steel, DS9

Thing that irritates me the most: Feeling I am slowly turning into Victor Meldrew as I approach 40. Working too much so I can't post on this blog.

Favourite joke: A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only cling-film for shorts.
The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

Guilty Pleasures: DIY SOS and Neil Diamond

Reasons for Blogging: Feeling part of a community - and it's great fun.

Preaching To The Converted

I was so looking forward to this. A returning enemy, a classic director - alternate worlds - lives in peril - human terror and walking steel death - what could go wrong? Er, quite a lot actually.

Oh don't get me wrong, there WAS a lot to like. The leads all had their moments in the spotlight. The Cybermen looked just fabulous. The Doctor was suitably Doctorish. Jackie Tyler was actually less annoying than Rose (which isn't saying much I know). Once again, Micky came off best. The delving into his back-story was long overdue, and urban warrior Ricky was nicely different.

But Roger Lloyd-Pack's performance...what was he thinking? Okay, so maybe the intention was to portray a man who is slowly divorcing himself of all his emotions in his obsessive quest to outwit death. My opinion kept veering from  "this is intentional - it's a homage to the Cybermen" to "this is pretty awful acting" before finally settling on "this is just crap". It wasn't Trigger in the mis-adventures of Del and Rodney he was channelling thank God, it was worse - it was Grottbags in "Emu's Pink Windmill Show". It's a real shame, as I'm sure RLP can act far better than this. I haven't seen acting this hammy since Richard Briers all those years ago.

The alternate versions of Rose's family were okay I guess. Pete was a better dressed wide-boy with connections and Jackie came across as a Chav Alexis Carrington with added cleavage. At least she gave Rose a good tongue-lashing. Heaven knows that when Rose was doing all her gooey-eyes at the Doc to persuade him to take her to see Pete, I just wanted to happy slap her (again). What an immature child.

It wasn't Trigger in the mis-adventures of Del and Rodney he was channelling thank God, it was worse - it was Grottbags in "Emu's Pink Windmill Show".

Other highlights? The TARDIS crash scene was just fabulous, as was the Doctor's reaction to the supposed death of his oldest friend (and is it really the oldest TARDIS in the universe?) The guy in the "downloading" crowd scene looked eerily familiar. The music choices were totally bizarre. Rigsby's ex-lodger made it to be Prime Minister.The Cybermen were (eventually) suitably menacing with their joy buzzer of death and I loved the militaristic marching with the mechanical "clomping" sound effect. Oh and that crash through the window was pretty cool.

I think my real problem with Rise Of The Cybermen was that it was just missing that magic "spark" that makes truly great TV. The sum of the (spare) parts just didn't quite make a cohesive whole.  I had no problems with the excellent direction or the music or the Cyber-voices - I was just hoping for epic confrontations and insights into the the human obsession with technology. Instead it was a panto evil genius and a cliffhanger as scary as Twiki from Buck Rogers. Maybe next week will deliver.

Talking of which, I'm going on holiday for a week, so my next review will be even later than usual! Enjoy The Age Of Steel.

The Slow Path

That title up there really sums how I feel about this review. For various reasons I have been lagging behind just about everyone else contributing to this little blog we call home. Snatching five minutes here and there to read a bit, only to find that some other bright spark has got in first with that finely crafted euphemism for shagging or perfectly captured my thoughts on how the Tenth Doctor is rapidly turning into the Jason King of space and time.

But I persevere with my humble typing - and you know why? It's because it's damn good FUN ! And that's what The Girl In The Fireplace was too. Cheesy, romantic, touching and above all FUN to watch. It's the first episode of this season that I have thought: " I want to watch that again straight away". But more importantly, the first one that my wife (she who really dislikes old "weasel face" Tennant) has sat through and at the end turned to me and said "That was really good". High praise indeed.

For me, there was no doubt that the Doctor DID in fact fall in love and that he DID make the beast with two backs with the gorgeous Madame. Just think about how much time could have passed for him between being asked to 'dance" and turning up back on the spaceship apparently drunk. It could've been days or even weeks, due to the distortion effect between the two time periods. Plenty of time to develop a deep loving bond.

And no, the world didn't implode due to the collective gnashing and wailing of a few hardcore fans, nor did the Internet crack in half with outpourings of bile - this was accepted as part of the quality storytelling.

What is interesting is the way that this tenth Doctor is developing (or not) his relationship with Rose. Several times in the course of the episode he seems almost ready to abandon her in favour of his new love - a far cry from the Eccleston version, who needed Rose as an emotional anchor. He plays the shining white knight to save Reinette, with no expectation of a way back, leaving Rose to her fate. However, I'm not sure if this is part of the overall season arc, or just inconsistent characterisation. I'm hoping it's the former. (Oh, and I did get where the horse had come from, I just think it came across badly on screen).

Mickey and Rose played the roles of Fred and Daphne in the "Whooby Gang" pretty well, with Tin Dog Boy actually coming off better for once as the duo uncovered the mystery of the empty ship. The clockwork androids were beautifully realised and suitable creepy - like sinister clowns but with better dress sense. I'm just sorry that some of the bit part actors seemed to give unintentionally wooden performances.

The production design was uniformly excellent though, as the BBC is rightly renowned for, and the horse through the mirror effect only slightly fake-looking. It did look like everyone was having a ball making this episode, and I'm sure Mr Tennant made sure he had plenty of retakes in his snogging scenes with Sophia Myles. I know I would. The chemistry between them was electric.

I think I would have liked to have seen Mickey go through the portal to give Madame her five year warning, simply because we have seen the "Rose bonds with another woman" shtick played out too many times already. Plus it would have been humorous to see his bumbling attempts at coping with being in the 18th-Century.

Those last scenes with a heart-broken Doctor were among the best this series has ever produced. And as for those final closing moments...when like an exquisite piece of, well clockwork I guess, everything comes together and it all makes perfect sense. Fantastic.

We mere humans are stuck here on a linear route through our lives, and the time travelling lifestyle of the Doctor may seem like an exciting one. But maybe, sometimes, the slow path is the easier one.

Friends Reunited

Almost didn't make it this week !

What would you do if YOU were a nine hundred year old alien with an almost infinite lifespan? Would you keep your "mortal" loved ones and friends around you, slowly watching them succumb to the ravages of old age until they died? Or would you take the Doctor's option and move on, leaving those you cared for behind in the prime of their life and always still alive in your memories? It's a difficult choice.

Even here in the mundane world, we all have had the experience of swearing we would keep in touch with a close friend, but, as the years rolled by, found we never actually did.

And it's a sense of the past - of loss and unfulfilled promise and longed-for opportunity's that pervades this episode of the new series. The point where Tennant's Doctor is first introduced to Sarah Jane is my favourite so far from his few stories. That goofy grin embodies all the same emotions I would have if I bumped into someone from my own past. The feelings he clearly shows of being nervous and excited and shy and happy all at the same time are just perfect and it's obvious from the outset that he cared deeply for Miss SJ Smith.

When Sarah discovers that this mysterious new teacher really IS the Doctor, her reactions are just as true. Was it my fault? What did I do wrong? Why didn't you come back? Liz Sladen has never really been away from the role of Sarah Jane, even when she wasn't on TV and it shows. I really can't fault her acting. The slight over theatrical edge has gone and we are left with a measured, real performance of someone who has moved on in some ways but at the same time never got over the first great love of her life. After all, who COULD compare to the Doctor?

For Rose, it's almost the opposite emotion. Here is the stark and painful realisation that you are NOT the first, you are NOT the only one - and even if you were, this guy is an alien and obviously doesn't think the same way you do. Rose needs this wake-up call to dampen down her cockiness. She was tolerable this week and I for one am glad Mickey "the Tin Dog" is aboard the TARDIS now - it's going to be an interesting dynamic.

Oh and there was a plot too amongst all this enjoyable emotional angst? Sure there was. It was a tasty bit of hokum about using kids as super computers and discovering the equation of matter control - hardly Shakespeare, but totally acceptable as a backdrop to the real meat of the story.

Tony Head gave a truly creepy performance as the leader of the Krillitanes. This is an actor who can turn his hand to anything. Bookish librarian, suave coffee man next door (even a trans-sexual from the planet Transylvania for any Rocky Horror fans like me) and now a slimy, hair-slicked-back conqueror of worlds. The standoff between him and the Doctor across the swimming pool could've come straight out of Once Upon A Time In The West - just replace Murray Gold's music with the classic theme by Ennio Morricone. I'm hoping we haven't seen the last of Mr Finch.

(By the way, ASH has performed with another Doctor Who actor prior to this - he was in a short-run play I went to see in the West End last year as the drunk best friend of Richard E Grant. It was great to see those two up really close and acting their socks off.).

I could waffle on about the great use of K-9, the pitch perfect goodbye to Sarah Jane which brought tears to my eyes, etc , etc - but this review is far too late and others have done it better already. Instead I will comment on a few random things which popped into my head whilst watching the episode:

• Is the new Doctor's catchphrase actually just going to be a bad case of verbal diarrhoea? The whole "Physics, physics, physics..." thing at the start just went on far far too long. I was left screaming at the screen "You've only got 45 minutes, get a bloody move on!". It came up last week too with the "I like my thumb..." bit as they walked out of the TARDIS. It's not funny and it's not clever and I hate it.
• Just how did K-9 get out of the car once Mickey had crashed it through the school gates? First he's stuck in the back seat giving advice and then suddenly he appears to save the day. What did I miss?
• So the Krillitanes explode when hit by the oil do they? If not how do you explain the school blowing up at the end (apart from the excuse for a cool effects shot)?
• Does the Doctor have a room in the TARDIS full of replacement K-9's? He whipped up a replacement pretty damn quick otherwise.

In the end, this was a great episode with some stellar performances and real closure on a decades-old partnership. We can only hope that the rest of the Doctor's rich history is treated with as much respect.

We all have our own Sarah Jane's. Would you want to meet yours again?

Wolf At The Door

Late as usual.

There was a point, as the closing credits rolled on Tooth And Claw (just as that bloody continuity annoucer was drowning out the middle eight once again) that I had to hold up my hands and admit  - OK Russell, I apologise, you can do decent endings. After my tirade last week about Mr D's shortcomings, it's almost like he was blowing a huge raspberry at me and writing a blinder just to make me eat my words. The ending was great - and the 45 minutes that preceded it weren't bad either. In fact plot wise they were damn near perfect.

Others have commented about the slo-mo monks in their BBC colours, and how derivative it was, (despite assertions from the production team that it was "the best opening ever") and sure, it wasn't anything we hadn't seen a hundered times before - at the movies. But when was the last time we saw something like this on a BRITISH TV show? I bet the kid's watching would've gone!" Wow! Cool!" - and isn't that the point? However, for me the best opening was Doctor Ten bashing seven bells out of the TARDIS console in time to Ian Dury. Just inspired.

I'll admit that the opening moments of the first meeting with old Queen Vicky did have me rolling my eyes thinking "Here we go - another thesp hamming it up and trying to do posh", but then, all of a sudden, there was a steely spark in Pauline Collins's eye, and she upped her performance. Here was a portrait of a fiery woman in control of her life, not some doting old granny bereft of wit and overcome with grief and mourning. It wasn't what I expected and at times even shocked me slightly, especially as she cooly gunned down her attacker later in the episode. A great performance.

I wish I could say the same about Rose. Sigh. I like the character. I like Billy Piper. But here she just grated on me a bit. Oh I can forgive the "We are not amused" tomfoolery (although I personally would have omitted one of the attempts from the edit), but Rose just came across as a shallow little girl with a bit of a smug attitude - and she semed to drag the Doctor down to her level too. Maybe the script didn't play to her strengths, but there was one point where I really wanted to give her a good slap.

As for the titular Timelord, his regeneration has obviously changed him from a haunted man looking for escape from his past into a confident one looking to embrace the joys of life. Tennant's performance wasn't flawless - his "angry" stance still needs some work - but there were some lovely "Doctorish" moments, especially licking the walls and stockpiling books in the library. Arm yourselves indeed.

Despite the Doc firing on all cylinders, like many I believe our duo are in for a shock due to their cocky attitudes. However, I'm beginning to wonder if the viewers are not in for one too. Up until now, the episodes have very much followed the pattern of season one - the Earth-based menance from everyday objects (TCI), The far future one (NE) and now the historical. But the message from the initial trailers was "Think you have seen it all?" At first look that seems like a simple hint at new adventures to come, but what if it has a deeper meaning? The Doctor is acting like he is in control and HAS seen it all, and have we the viewer become jaded enough already to think we know what is to come? I think a BIG curve ball is due to hit this season.

Ok back to the plot - and that wolf. You have to admit, the CGI was magnificent. From the first terrifying transformation from host to beast, to my absolute favourite moment with the Doc and the wolf on opposite sides of the door, this was without doubt one of the best examples of special effects served up by a British TV channel. Snarling, feral and at times pant-wetingly scary, this was just what was needed to get the little tykes scurrying for the safety of the sofa. Sure, there was a teensy bit too much running around corridors and some of the logic was a bit suspect - just how were the monks intending to get the wolf BACK in the cage when it had dined on Queen Victoria? But this was a classic iconic monster brought to life with skill and passion.

And so we come to the finale, where amazingingly RTD's plot actually arrives at a sensible, understandable and believable solution to the problem at hand. I'll admit that once Queenie revealed the prescence of that huge hunk of ice in her possession, I had a reasonably good idea of where things were going, but for once you could genuinely join the dots of the hints laid earlier to get there.

The wolf got a messianic-like death (I think it was the host that was crying out for death rather than the parasitic creature itself) and good triumphed once more. But at such a cost. The body count in this episode was huge - it's no wonder that Victoria rewarded the Doctor and Rose for their help and then banished them. How could she trust a couple who treated life so glibly and swapped jokes while her subjects died? I didn't see this as proof that the Queen was possessed, more an affirmation of her duty as monarch and her well known strong stance on morality and family values.

At the end of all this, the Doctor and Rose stride off into the TARDIS, literally howling at the thought of a Royal Family of lycanthropes and that's it.... except it wasn't. The expected theme music didn't arrive and instead we have great little scene which sets up an adversary, a spin-off and shows that the Doctor's actions can have unexpected consequences.

Torchwood is coming - and there will be dark days ahead... 

Cat - astrophe

At last, I return from the wilderness - months of stress from moving house, a 7 year old with apendicitis and no internet finally behind me (and I have missed being part of this blog) - only to find that the joy of new Doctor Who on the telly has been replaced with a pervading sense of...is that it?

So, I know I am nearly a week late, but here we go with my thoughts on:

New Earth

By the way - I'm not going to review the story as such, for fear of repeating the wise words of others. So instead, let's begin with...endings.

Now I happen to like Russell T's writing. A lot. The original Queer As Folk was a masterclass. Casanova was a great romp, and Mine All Mine was...okay well everyone has an off day. But he IS a good writer. With great ideas. However, sometimes I think that his ideas are typed onto the keyboard faster than his brain can think, and we end up with nonsense instead of finely tuned drama. And nowhere is this more obvious than in his endings. Take Queer As Folk 2: another cracking script, brilliantly acted, but, oops I can't think of a way to end this in the time available so I'll completely cock up the internal realistic consistency of my world and tack on a SF lite ending to get me out of a corner. And let's be honest, who was happy with the end of The Second Coming after the build up of the previous two hours? I know I wasn't.

And this flaw in RTD's writing skills is soooooo evident in "New Earth". It's the concepts where Russell's at - dozens of them flying at the screen in mad profusion. Weird cat-like nuns? Check. Zippy alien visuals? Check. Bit of vague social commentary? You betcha. Chuck in a "old" villain and a dose of high camp and stir briskly before simmering for 45 minutes. One can almost imagine Russell musing in his office "Hmmm what diseases shall I give the lab rats? I know! ALL of them!" before Bwa-ha-ha-ing manicly in that booming laugh of his. Voila, the perfect Doctor Who souffle. Not. Because when it comes down to it, Russ has a mental block with endings. Sometimes he can do it (QAF1) but often, he just can't make the grade.

Oh, it all sounds so good on paper - and some of it even comes off on screen. I actually liked the decontamination shower scene. I liked the chavtastic Cassandra / Rose. Some of the dialogue is sparkily crisp, and even the "samba" moment raised a grin. But it's that ending that is the dog turd on the pavement.

Back in his office, Russell the T is sweating... "Bugger I've got three plot strands, eight main characters, a zombie army and only five minutes of time left. I know! With one bound he was free... no...no that's Spider-man. Got it! The Doctor saves the zombies with some coloured sugar water and a hug. Phew that was close, and no one will notice a thing. Bwa-ha-ha-ha".

On the plus side, Russell does write some of the best one-liners,quotable dialogue and stand out scenes in the business - stuff which you KNOW the kids will be repeating in the playground on Monday's  - and, although I don't quite think the stem cell research / hospital zombies analogy stands up to scrutiny, I CAN see what he was aiming for. Billie Piper looked fantastic throughout and yer man David IS the Doctor, lever pulling an' all.

As a side note, I thought it was clever how the main BBC trailers made it look like the clips were from lots of different episodes when actually most of them were from New Earth. Sneaky. But someone please tell me what the Tardisode had to do with the main plot? The screaming woman at the end of the clip wasn't really a lead in to the episode was it? I guess it was more about setting the tone.

Final scores on the doors then... A C+ for effort but must try harder at not letting the big ideas overwhelm the plot. And I want a proper ending dammit !

Incidentally, a happy Christmas to all of you at home

It's official. The Doctor Who Christmas Special will air on BBC1 on Christmas Day itself!

Go here for the short statement on the official BBC page.

No news on a time yet, but I'm hoping it will be in the evening "let's all sit down and watch some telly" slot rather than the "let's all stuff our faces and pass out" early afternoon.