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Mar 04, 2007

The Storming of The Met Office

The Seeds of Death - Episode 5

Only time for a few brief points of note:

  • As the temperature climbs Fewsham finally locates his balls and prevents Zoe from being killed by an Ice Warrior whilst on the set of a Pan's People dance interpretation.
  • Periodically, throughout the episode, Fewsham looks like a man who's just found out that he can shit gold, but has only 3 minutes left alive to spend it.
  • The Doctor is back with us after having, apparently, spend the preceding episode flat out having a pervy dream about Victoria and Jamie - if his moans of ecstasy are any indication.
  • The big T-MAT boss from the United Nations pitches up and must have been asleep like the Doctor because he didn't know there'd been a manned rocket launch.
  • The Met Office's annual foam part has gone badly wrong. Bill Giles' ass has melted to the photocopier, the foam machine Daniel Corbett brought in has got to tits and John Kettley's gambling problem has really gotten out of hand.
  • The machinery in the weather bureau appears to be about as sophisticated as sticking felt weather shapes onto a map. And so simple that even Michael Fish couldn't get a forecast wrong.
  • Why, throughout the entire story, are we continually treated to the visual treat that is the arse of Slaar?
  • The Ice Warriors end game appears to involve turning the Earth's environment into something similar to that of Mars, and with it instantly forcing Russ Abbott to re-record his hit, 'Atmosphere', renaming it '(Not Much) Atmosphere'.

The Bumper Book of Made Up Doctor Who Facts has this to say about part 5 of The Seeds of Death: the most popular Ice Warrior names for boys born between the 17th and 19th Glorious Quadrants of the Greatly Great and Super Martian Civilization were Slaar, Slaaw, Sluum and Sluut.


Hey I only hope my arse looks as good in vinyl as Slaar's does. That's an alien with some fine physique and poise, there.

The Arse Of Slaartheen?

"Quit looking at my arse!"

"I can't, milord! It's EVERYWHERE!"

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