I was going to go into one of my usual rants about how the British public shouldn't be allowed to have any say in the outcome of a reality show (see America for details) but there's no point. Forget the quality and feel the telephone revenue instead. And so, Maxwell (love him or hate him, you couldn't ignore him) walks into the sunset leaving behind Science, a man who needs an ego-boost like Jordan needs a breast enlargement.
And Vanessa is starting to do my nut in. So much so, I've even tried to work out how much it would cost me to travel down to the studio and throw some tomatoes at her when she's evicted (please, let it be soon!). I can't abide her. I don't think any other contestant in the history of this show (both here and abroad) has come anywhere close in the annoying stakes. The way she talks has the same effect as nails on a blackboard to me.
On the Barns front it's still all-go. I can't go into the specifics, mainly because I don't understand them, but things are definitely moving quickly (I'll be posting some photos later this week). And as amazing as this may sound to anyone who knows me, I actually got my hands dirty last weekend. Yep, I climbed onto a roof and hammered holes into sheets of asbestos which I then tore down without the aid of a safety rope or mask. It might save money in the short term but I think I may have shaved a couple of years off my life too...
I didn't want to get involved, of course, but when everyone (and I mean everyone - even the kids) decide to spend the hottest July in recent memory up to their necks in bricks and mortar, well, there's nothing else you can do but join in.
It's not all bad news though; on the weekdays we leave it to the "daft lads", a group of young Irish teenagers who are a bit like programmable automatons. For example, if you gave one of them a shovel and you told them to dig a hole you could come back two days later and he'd be halfway to Australia.
We must have gone up in the world. We have slaves and a swimming pool. Well, an inflatable pool (technically, it's too big to be called a paddling pool but 'swimming' is probably pushing it).
Today was slightly surreal experience. There I was, sitting in said pool watching a couple of rabbits running through a corn field, while less than 200 yards behind me an Irish navy is using a JCB (which broke my bloody patio!) to pull down a wall.
Thank God for iPods.
And finally, to everyone who has emailed me to ask where the next Tachyon TV update has got to - go away! I'm busy!
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