Superman Nicked

With all the bad publicity surrounding ASBOs recently the Police pulled off a massive victory in the war against anti-social behaviour by arresting Superman. Supe had been out for a few bevies with other super heroes and was tanked up when he made his way to the Brixham Kebab house, on the Old Kent Road, London, at 2 in the morning.

Entering the shop through a brick wall the soused super hero proceeded to mash up the counter with his mighty fists demanding more garlic sauce than the kebab house had on offer. Police beat him into submission by showing him clips from Superman IV which rendered him a blubbering wreck.

The ASBO placed on Superman has a number of special clauses, most notably the creation of a no-fly zone around his bed-sit in Balham and an electronic tag connected to one of his ankles using Kryptonite-laced Velcro.

Reported by Damon Querry