Sci Fi Audit

Champagne flowed and streamers rained from the ceiling as the European arm of Sci-Fi Channel celebrated its first year of programming without any new science fiction shows whatsoever.

"The great thing is that no-one has noticed" said one exec. "Medical Investigations kinda looks Sci-Fi, because it's got that guy from the X-Files in it, and Robot Wars has got Craig Charles in it (sometimes). Add to that documentaries about UFOs that even Discovery won't show, documentaries about ghosts that even Living won't show, and endless re-runs of series that were cancelled before we showed them the first time round, and we actually got away with it".

Some industry specialists argue that a series currently being stripped called The Pretender may actually count as science fiction - sort of - but have been unable to find anyone, anywhere, who has actually watched more than two minutes of it.

Reported by Steve Sethur